~~In the shoes of women who are too broken to ever mend.. love which doesn’t stays.. stories that never complete and dreams that turn nightmare.~~
Nothing could convince her because her own heart was her biggest enemy. She looked at herself in the mirror more times than she should. Every time she did, all she saw was the flaws. She has been called pretty, but which human didn’t lie.
There was nothing, absolutely nothing remarkable about her and she had learnt not to trust… never trust the ones who called you pretty but couldn’t prove it. Some people are not born to be pretty, some people are born to just fulfill their part in someone else’s story.
No, she had to stop thinking all of this. She woke up with a strong determination not to let someone else become the reason for how the day went. She will rule the world on her own terms, at least her own world, if not the entire kingdom. However, all the 3 o clock resolve, all the 2 o clock sleepless night determination, once again melted in a pool of nothingness as the memories of her sweet yesterday washed over her.
Why was it so hard to believe that her love would last?
Why was it so hard to believe that someone could see beyond the ordinary?
Why was it so hard to pretend that she was smiling?
Why did she question even the things that were answers?
Why did it hurt to feel incomplete?
Perhaps, she was meant to be like this. she would have insecurities even if she were pretty. Some people are destined to have their life chained in questions that shall forever be unanswered. She will have to learn to let go.. let go either of the insecurities and cherish the now which could be her brand of forever or let go of the love that was eating her up like cocaine.. she died a little every time she got high.
The choice had to be made. but what did she pick?
Could she even pick? That was the problem. She took, she never picked. She fell with the flow because she was never strong enough to stand for her own.
One day she will leave but she will leave after instilling so many memories that no matter where you go, she will haunt you. She will be the worst nightmare in your most beautiful dream because the cocaine which kills is also the drug that haunts.
She was having her final goodbye today and she would be the worst goodbye you ever had. Her goodbye will wreck your hello’s. The sound of her smile shall drown your tears. You’ve let her down, she didn’t cry, but now when she will let you down, you will realize that every time you did what she did to you, she died a hundred times and more.
She will leave today and when she does, you will look for her but she was never going to come back. Her hello was always a goodbye, but her goodbye will never be another hello. She came to love, but she went to destroy you.
Never hurt a girl who loved you because when they leave, they damage you in ways even God shudders to explain. They will slice your heart and you won’t even know how. Don’t love me, she had whispered and he didn’t. However, he had smiled and told he did. She had thanked him but never believed he did because how could she when she knew he never had ONE reason to be in love.
She was a disaster waiting to happen and she happened, but sadly the disaster was HE and the storm was SHE. She came, conquered and moved away. He stayed, witnessed and was lost. She is more powerful than you will ever know. Don’t burn her, don’t fool her.. you will never come out safe. She is simply tearing you apart and you’re a fool not to know it.
She loved you, she did but when she waved her goodbye, she knew you were never hers. You’ve never been and you will never be. She wasn’t meant to be someone’s. She came to hurt and she did.
Some storms are meant to kill, she was the cocaine she was having. She was a poison. She killed the part of her that made her alive. She killed with goodbyes.
P.S. Partly inspired by the characters in White Oleander.