It is no surprise that I love letters; all types of letters. The fact that I have written more than received is another thing. When I stumbled upon this amazing 30-day letter challenge HERE, I was jumping a bit too high for my own comfort. I might not write all of these, but I am definitely going to try.
The prompt for day 30 is a letter to your reflection in the mirror.
Okay, so it has been a really long time since I continued this series, but hey it’s better late than never!
Look at you, looking so terrible. You could easily pass for trash and no I am not talking about the external appearances (Though, you’ve never been pretty! What!! This is me talking to myself, so did you even expect I was going to talk that absolutely-bulls**t-stuff that you’re beautiful). You look like trash because you’ve let that happen to you and trust me, you’re the only one to blame.
Today, I want you to know that you’re stronger than the biggest hurt. Chin up because you don’t need to face the music, you need to be the music that plays your own heart. Yes, You’ve been a disappointment. You’ve been the reason for too many tears. You’ve failed to be the perfect friend, the perfect person, the perfect whatever, but know this, You remain God’s creation. HE made YOU and He had a reason. He chose to give you the flaws you had for one of the two reasons. Either you deserved this (YES, Mr Karma, you could stop smiling like a hunk) or He knew, you had it in you to work with your flaws and grow up to be the person not everyone is going to hate.
No, life is not going to be one cakewalk. There’re a lot of speed breakers, blind alleys, crossed turns and you, for one, have always been terrible traveler with absolutely no road sense. So, even if the road was straight, you would still be trapped in the endless curves that actually never existed.
Dear myself, despite all the troubles and the wreck you are and the pendulum of thoughts swinging dark inside you; remember, you made it. YES, YOU DID! Trust me, I thought you never will, but you did so perhaps you do know how to chin up and play the guitar even though you suck with music and you’ve a really bad voice.
I am sorry dearest myself, if I’ve been a little brutal but honesty, dear is a rare thing and if I can’t be honest with yourself/myself, how the hell do I expect people to be honest with me. I must be quick to add here. Don’t EVER expect things from anyone; not even yourself. No, this is not a complain. This is something I’ve thought a lot and understood. When you expect things out of anyone, you are actually trying to make someone into something, but that dear isn’t what love is. When you can give without demanding a thing in return, you leave a trail of happiness. People may not realize it soon, sometimes they may not realize it at all, but it should not bother you because you need to do it for yourself.
And oh yes, your heart is a traitor. It beats inside you, stays with you but never belongs to you… It needs another name, another place to call it home.. The heart is always a traitor but don’t be sorry for that because sometimes, we are who we are for a lot of reasons.
Did I make sense? Not much, you would say and we two shall together smile because you and me, have always been that… senseless creatures wearing hearts on their sleeves, hoping against hope that we come with a miracle written on the forgotten face, always forgetting that fairytales had a pretty princess.
However, don’t you worry now. You’re not a pretty princess, but you’re a fighter. You will fight. You will make it through. Life isn’t always so tiring. You have your sunshine days and your horribly high pitched laugh will once again break all that layers after layers of doors that you have put to patch a few things. Life is beautiful, even if you are not and it is okay, if one of the two is beautiful.
Live it up, drink it down, gulp the pain, plaster a smile. Everything is temporary, just like YOU!
From dust we come.
To dust we go.
And okay, I do give a good not-so-pep-but-hello-reality- talk.
We should meet more often.
Go shop and cover the trash.
Shopping still is your favorite therapy. Works better than chocolates because it is calorie-free.
One day, you will reflect upon your life and still smile because good or bad, the moments you lived are S-P-E-C-I-A-L. No one can take that away from you, not even yourself. Let that traitor (heart) live and fake a smile.
*HAVE NO REGRETS BECAUSE YOU DON’T GET TO WRITE YOUR STORY. YOU PLAY THE ROLE GOD HAS PICKED FOR YOU.*
So, what if you ain’t pretty, don’t have the fairytale script, you still have me and sometimes myself to myself is all we need.
There you go, the trash is getting a little less *trashy* 😛
Special Shout out to a few named and unnamed people who may or may not read this.
Karly Sue.. you don’t know how much your emails meant to me. They help us feel that sometimes distances do not matter, hearts do.
Al Forbes: we didn’t speak these days, but somehow I still recall the email you emailed long back when I needed it.
Some unnamed peeps because you don’t always need to name. You’ve heard everything I had to say even when I made no frigging sense. Sometimes, a thank you is so inconsequetial and yet so veracious. You know who you are!
David Ellis: Somehow talking about cats with you is sometimes all I need to do to smile and your humor and that voice clip with the super cool British accent surely adds that big fat icing to the cake. Remember, we both owe a big chocolate treat to each other.
Nibha: For helping me remember I had this wonderful series left but I was talking about another one. Will start that soon too.
Myself: for being patient enough to deal with the mess I am. *Has a super narcisstic moment*
This list could well be another blog post.
Signing off again,
It will all be OKAY. If it’s not okay, it’s not OVER.